For a split second, I forgot about the beauty of the ocean. Of creation, of life, of God’s design. In that moment I forgot my connection to it and my connection to God when I would see it every day. I would forget how it was full of love, full of grace, and full of God. I never thought my eyes would get tired of it but when I was thinking about everything I had to do, get done, get finished, get ahead on the ocean seemed like another physical feature of the Earth that wasn’t all that striking anymore.
In that split second, the ocean meant nothing. It just happened to be there. It wasn’t until I walked through the breezeway on the fifth floor that I remembered. The wind gently came and kissed my face as it brushed my hair back and cooled my neck. There I was, broken all over again, for a relentless God who is constantly asking me to turn over my heart, constantly asking me to relinquish control over to Him. Not because He wants to make a greater mess of me, to scold me or point His finger but because He wants to make something beautiful out of my anxious thoughts and my doubt. He knows what I can handle on my own, where He can grow, challenge, and stretch me to be stronger and a loving fighter. But when He knows I can’t do it on my own, He is there to help bear the weight and ease the burden.
The ocean reminds me of that.
Here is the ocean, vast and wide, teeming with life of every kind, both large and small.
{Psalm 104:25}
It whispers to me to let me know that God is in the air that kisses my face, and He is in the tangible ocean that stirs my heart yet calms my thoughts. He sends me little reminders and little hints of His presence and His will for my life that I can’t predict and I can’t conjure up on my own. He is asking me to open up my heart, my hands, my eyes, and every depth of my mind and soul so that He can go deeper. So that He can take me to a place I struggle to plant my feet. So that I can align more with His design and become more in tune with the wave lengths of His heart.
In the depths of trust, in the depths of uncertainty, in the depths of the ocean, there are things that we can’t see. There are things we won’t understand, that will make our minds trip over themselves time and time again only so that we become more confused, broken, hurt, or uncertain to the point we might be second guessing everything. But it is in those moments that God shows up. He may bring tears to our eyes, a song to our lips, or waves of peace just to let us feel that we will be more than fine only because of the God of mercy, renewal, and peace going before and after us.
The Protector, Peace Maker, Redeemer, Guide, Abba, Father, Lord of All reminds me with His ocean depths and mountain tops and country sides that the precious pieces and chapters of this life aren’t forever. But He is forever. He is constant, and He is certain that our stories mean something and that walking with Him may not be easy yet it is worth it.
He wants to take you oceans deep to show you trust, to show you surrender, to show you unimaginable amounts of love so that you will walk with him through trials and triumphs knowing that He is good.